Gazette welcomes new columnist

Pittsburg native Laura Oglesby stays busy raising four crazy kids with her husband, Shaun. She will be writing the column, "Hide Your Crazy," featured on the Opinion page.

“Whoop that butt!” “Good Lord, he’s just being a kid!” Admit it. If you’re a parent, you’ve thought it, discussed it with your friends and some have even had the grits to say it to another. We’re not just swimming in a sea of judgments, we’re drowning in it. We judge others, we judge ourselves, and boom! A new word is born, comparison.

I’m a strict parent when it comes to obeying. Why? In my mind, if you don’t learn “No,” “Stop!” or “GO!” by walking age, you will see a pretty road, set out to go play on said road, get hit by a car or kidnapped and die. It’s how my mind works. I’m also strict on keeping to consequences. Why? If I warn you 12 times with no consequence, you think I’m a joke. Therefore, you don’t obey and you die. Momma don’t play.

On the flip side, I let my kids close-line, tackle and body slam each other off of hay bales while pulling off some pretty sweet, death-defying, back flips. Yep. I’m in the back ground taking pictures, yelling, “Do the back flip again, but this time through a ring of fire! I’ll get the matches!” I seem to be satisfied telling myself, “Boys will be boys, memories are being made and ninja skills must be perfected.” Not all my friends, nor my family, parent like me. In fact, some are quite the opposite.

I admire the qualities of other parents that I don’t seem to possess. Like patience and the ability to hold off of smart aleck remarks. If we set the scene in Walmart, you may see me being praised by an older couple for my willingness to bring my kids along to a place of darkness and torment, keeping them orderly and well-mannered, all while keeping a smile on my face. What great parenting! How patient I must be! God bless me.

Well… I need that blessing because reality is for the past two hours I have threatened small lives, whooped two butts, thumped four heads, gave one “I’ll cut you” motion and cussed five times. I’m not smiling, I am gritting my teeth because I am angry at the prices, the reckless buggy drivers (hit my kid and get throat punched), and my husband for going fishing and leaving me to carry four kids through the pits of hell known as Walmart. I leave Walmart not only feeling frustrated, but also like an ungrateful person, a horrible mom, but a great actress.

Comparison is the thief of joy. I feel overwhelmed because it’s hard to keep four kids in line at all times. Yet if I don’t, I’m not as good as that mom over there. It’s defeating. As parents, we are called to LOVE our children. We protect and teach them life’s lessons through our love. Let it be our daily prayer to show our KIDS our love and not worry so much if we’ve conveyed to the world how well we’ve got this parenting thing down.